XV
Enough
‘Jesus asked them, ‘’Do you believe that I am able to do this?’’ Matt 9:28
A few years back I wrote a long and rambling dissertation on a group of reformers in the 15th century – exciting I know!. This group was appearing in Europe around the time of the reformation when the Protestant Church was born. The great leader of this Protestant movement was the (initially reluctant) minister Martin Luther. As any good theology student would tell you, Luther was the grand daddy of the ‘Justification by Faith Alone’ or sola fide argument. Faith in God, in his grace, mercy, compassion and power being at the centre of our walk with God. It interested me therefore to find this little excerpt from a discussion between Luther and one of his ‘flock’.
‘In Torgau a wretched little woman once came to me and said ‘Ah, dear Doctor, I have the idea that I’m lost and can’t be saved because I can’t believe.’ I (Luther) replied, ‘Do you believe, dear lady, that what you pray in the creed is true?’ She answered with clasped hands, ‘Oh yes, I believe it is; it’s most certainly true!’ To which I replied, ‘Then go in God’s name, dear lady. You believe more and better than I.’ It’s the devil who puts such ideas into people’s heads and says, ‘Ah, you must believe better. You must believe more. Your faith is not very strong and is insufficient’. In this way he drives them to despair.
...Now this is ‘the grand daddy’ of the ‘by faith alone’ argument saying all this. It makes me think that he knew a thing or two about doubt, maybe a thing or two about being under attack too. Perhaps he knew what it was like to feel as if his faith wasn’t genuine; maybe he had felt that others around him seemed to be more ‘spiritual’, more on fire for God than he; maybe he had felt lost in the smokescreen of this material world; or perhaps everyone else seemed to be going for it with God and he felt like he was ‘playing Christian’ rather than being one?
As I look back over those questions I’d have to put up my hand and say, ‘Yep, I’ve felt that way too at times’.
I think a lot of us have been in that place where doubt and low ‘spiritual self esteem’ (if there is such a thing) abound. It usually comes up when big decisions of life/future/work/relationships and calling rear their heads. Sometimes it just comes up when life seems predictable and over-comfortable. Often it’s when we’re faced with the question – Do I really believe God’s got ‘this’ in His hands? If I put my trust in him, will he come through? The question I guess we’ve got to ask if we’re in that situation is – what do we do? Is it a question of trying harder? How much faith should we have?
John Ortberg’s book ‘‘If you want to walk on water you’ve got to get out of the boat’’ drew my attention to a good answer to this question, and I hope that if today, right now, as you read, doubt or worry is something you’re facing, that God will encourage and challenge you, as he is challenging me, in this simple response.
‘ Ole Hallesby writes about the father who comes to Jesus to ask him to help him ‘if you can’.
‘If?’ Jesus says. ‘All things are possible to him who believes’.
‘I do believe’ the man says, ‘help my unbelief’
Like most of us, he was a mixture of trust and doubt.
How much faith did he have?
‘Enough to come to Jesus,’ Hallesby writes. ‘And that was enough’.
How much faith do I need? Not a feeling of certainty. Just enough faith to take a step.
